Broken, Token, Awoken - A Beautiful Ashes review by Toakahu Pere ‘If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.’ ~ Marcus Aurelius, Meditations. As much as I think I follow every word Mentor Aurelius says, I realise now it is not that simple. Over the decades, feminism has come in waves, each more provocative and volatile than the last. First came votes, then came independence, and the third is yet to be defined. In such an emotionally charged climate, stories of true feminism find it hard to slip through the cracks woven together so tightly by the fabric of political correctness, toxicity, and even extremism. Celebrities and icons rule and flood the standards of what it means to be women – when ironically feminism calls for women to decide for themselves. But what if there was a book of true tales that were written by women who chose to be nameless? What if there was a book of feminism without the word? Beautiful Ashes is a short yet shocking collection of stories of three women united under the blatant yet critical and powerful language of Natasha Whitewood, who she herself is included as one of the unfortunate storytellers. I can only hope to use the memory-based analogy of a loose apple on a cart – one that falls and is left behind to wither, and the driver continues their eye on the horizon. But upon examining the language used, both horrific and uncensored, these terrors have become deeply ingrained in these women’s identities. To this day, I am unsure of how I feel about this fact. Council dictates that we must let go, and yet here are three women who carry these apples with them, and let them rot in their laps. I see now as I read through for the eighth time in preparation for this review, that they rot to ashes, and they are, oh, so beautiful. This review will not analyse each individual story nor will it make social commentary any further. Rather, it will pursue the kaupapa – the topic or lesson to be learned – as its author(s) intended. I had the honour of speaking with Miss Whitewood after her Chartwell Library stop of her Beautiful Ashes hikoi. Unfortunately short on time, the conversation nonetheless developed breadth and depth of what the book’s purpose was, its language, and its importance. Broken, Token, Awoken. Broken I am a budding writer so the questions I posed to Miss Whitewood ran the theme of literary value, particularly language, devices, style, and imagery. Originally floored by my forward questions, Miss Whitewood floored myself in return by elegantly moving towards her purpose. What her goal was; what the message was; and so long as she held to the topic and moral, her writing flowed and the product of her labour was consistent and powerful. The purpose of Beautiful Ashes ought to be seen as more of an interim. Like one were to read the center chapters of an epic, right at the moment where the hero is overcome and reaches for the nearby sword, slightly out of reach. These women focused their stories to where everything reached a boiling point; accelerated beginnings, lengthy middles, and no true end. Normally, this would set readers for the hills, but I advise them to stay and see the purpose unfurl itself. Stories of violence and violation in every sense of the words have reduced these women to ash. The reader is taken through each emotionally excruciating word to understand these women’s journeys as ninety-degree falls rather than downward spirals. From the times I read the book, I saw no actual happiness in the final sentences of each women, but I saw words of clarity, maturity, and contentment – therein lay the beauty to the ash. Who would be happy to have gone through such horror, I ask. But I see a stretching of the muscles after lying down for so long. These women have been advocated for and voiced only a part of their lives to we who are both fortunate and unfortunate to hear. And in doing so, in our visions of nightmare and betrayal, they are free. Miss Whitewood has achieved her purpose. Token The language of Beautiful Ashes comes across as sugared and fictionally playful. I deny this. A question I posed to Miss Whitewood, both at the Chartwell Library and in the interview, regarded the biblical language used. Peppered throughout the book are scanned writings belonging to Miss Whitewood and the other two women’s diaries, denoting poetry and prayers. Addressing the obvious first: these entries and inclusions succeeded in their immersion and ethos. But the most controversial aspect is the religious undertone. I defend this now. Biblical language is indeed powerful, having woven itself in humanity’s history for thousands of years and to this day still serves as a selling point for a lot of political standpoints and derisive and divisive language. Many readers may – and I predict will – criticise the book for the inclusion of biblical quotes, biblical imagery, and biblical hope. However… When one reads the sheer gore that these women waded through, and seeing them reach to the only spirit that loved and saw them, the biblical language immediately becomes understandable and even hopeful and encouraged. The women’s stories involved loved ones who could not hear their cries, ignored their cries, or were the cause of their cries. Who else could these women have turned to? The being who wanted nothing but to give the love they were deprived of or cheated out of. As I said to Miss Whitewood, the inclusion of prayers and quotes outweigh the cons of their past, making them necessary to this immortalisation of their journey. They inspire no change of loyalty or belief, only a statement that their spirituality carried them through – like the singular footprints in the sand. It would be foolish and in fact a major mistake to not include such language in a book detailing the search for answers. It seems that ANY answer was a logical answer and it shows in the writing – how they speak to God, write about God, search for God. Even someone who has set aside religion in the pursuit of truth and creativity, I myself never felt threatened by the language. For once, lack of relevance is very much relevant to combat these betrayals. The blatant and uncoated language for the story components - showing this happened, then this, and finally this – details a garish succession and quick-fire story telling. As a result it has kept the book short but no more emotionally palatable in the stories themselves. It refuses to sugarcoat or creatively spin what happened; choosing no ulterior method of conveying violent themes has created effectiveness in its purpose and therefore language. Awoken I must tread carefully in this final segment of the review. The importance of Beautiful Ashes comes in a full revolution in the glaring and worrying fact that the betrayal in these stories is both thematic and indiscriminate. It highlights many facets, including relationships, sex, appreciation, trust, and the health surrounding these. But what I think the issue was that befell these women was their inability to see their self-worth. Only when they turned their sights inward did they realise that relationships, sex, appreciation, trust, and so on, relied too heavily on others. Pouring time, money, and effort into these things has left them scarred and burned from the lack or complete absence of reciprocation. However, as they have encountered spirituality, will power, passion, and hobbies, they have realised that what makes them happy and their lives whole is to do with themselves and their individuality. These have no business with other people. Beautiful Ashes promotes and advocates the individuality of these women, who may have suffered similar or dissimilar pain - it matters not on the mediocrity - rather that they have wound up in the same plain of enlightenment or in the very least an understanding of independence, self-worth, and ambition to be, see, and standardise better. The importance for the wider community is one I hope will make nationwide coverage. In no way was this meant to be the champion of unsung beauty, or to compartmentalise suffering to solely females who have found spiritual salvation. Rather, it is meant to speak but remain unspoken for. It has taught me valuable lessons to pay heed to as a male, and as someone who is trusted around females. Warning signs, opportunities to uplift, and how to approach, are all things I have now learned thanks to these women. Shamefully, I did not know many of these things before, but like a major theme to this book: Work and hope for better, not the best. Beautiful Ashes is a voice in the dark society is too afraid to see even in this day and age dominated by media and ideology. Too often, we battle these conjured enemies when it was loved ones who harmed these women. It attacks no parties; men, families, or otherwise, and it instead grounds their horror in linear patterns of being alone but standing alone by the grace of their God. I witnessed individuals who believed in someone else rather than herself and have traded their self-worth for disloyalty and distrust only to find themselves uplifted by that which they believed had abandoned them. Natasha Whitewood has uplifted these women with her successful purpose in advocating the voices and stories to be heard. Through the language their voice is empowered and imbued with ambition, pride, and womanly strength to embrace these rotted apples to their last. A personal and deeply rooted book, accompanied by an empty journal for the reader to write in goes hand in hand with the story’s theme. From Beautiful Ashes to Rise. I recommend this book and its companion journal to anyone who wishes to accept the burn and Phoenix their way out. If only I had the space and vocabulary to speak more on this eye opening read. ‘Take the baking of bread. The loaf splits, and those very cracks, in one way a failure of the baker’s profession, somehow catch the eye and give particular stimulus to our appetite. Figs likewise burst open… olives ripened on the tree are at the very proximity of decay… Looked at in isolation, these things are far from lovely, but their consequence on the processes of Nature and endurance enhances them.’ ~ Marcus Aurelius, Meditations. Well, what do you know? Every word of his is indeed simple.